The Hope in Fear
by OwlBeWritingYouFrequently
Summary: It's the night before the 57th expedition and Levi wants some company. Levi/Petra oneshot


**Author's note: I wanted to make Levi as close to character as possible (don't know if I succeeded, you tell me) but still be able to get the point across. Well, here you go.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin or any of its characters.**

It was the night before the 57th expedition was to set out. Somewhere outside the old castle an owl hooted. Levi lie awake in his bed, legs crossed and an arm behind his head. Moonlight shone in through the window in dusty beams. He watched the little flecks of dust float together, almost coordinated yet distinctly individual. He thought about their strategy, much like those specks of nothing.

Sleep would not come for him tonight.

Levi sat up. There was something about this place that was so suffocating sometimes. He needed to go somewhere. Though anywhere he went he would feel breathless, he supposed. The suffocation was in his mind, really; it lingered. Perhaps he sought not somewhere or something to alleviate it, but _someone_. A calming presence, a cheerful air, a wise mind…

Petra.

He stood up – a bit hastily should he have looked back and examined his behavior – and walked over to the door. He paused as his hand gripped the doorknob.

What a scandal that would be. The other members of the Survey Corps finding their commanding officer – their emotionally constipated, aloof commanding officer – emerging from the quarters of a subordinate. Oh, the uproar.

But it wouldn't have been as if they'd _done_ anything other than talk. And what was wrong with that? She was a friend. He cared for the girl. And yet, the thought was too outlandish for his style. Levi was certainly not the type of man who sought others for comfort.

"To hell with it," he muttered. Without another thought of consequence – though his plan had changed slightly to merely walking by her room a few times – he threw the door open. And to his surprise, the very girl he was thinking about stood before him, hand raised as if about to knock.

"Oh!" Petra gasped. Levi stared back wide-eyed at her. He swallowed hard, quickly reclaiming his usual stoicism.

"Captain Levi," she said, giving a salute. "I'm sorry if I disturbed you at all, but I was wondering…" her voice trailed off, but Levi understood exactly what she was trying to say. He stepped aside and motioned for her to enter. She stepped inside and he closed the door behind her. The room was illuminated by moonlight, but Levi felt it necessary to light the lantern. Once lit, he turned to face her. She scratched her hair sheepishly as she spoke.

"I'm sorry to bother you, Captain, but I couldn't sleep."

"It's fine, Petra. Neither could I," he replied. He leaned up against his desk and folded his arms.

"You know, you really should try to get some sleep, Captain. Big day tomorrow," she scolded him jokingly.

"And I could say the same to you." At this Petra smiled, sitting down on the edge of his bed. She placed her hands on either side of her. Levi stared at her, either waiting for her to continue bantering or explain why she was here. Either way he felt relieved for the company. She looked up at him for a few moments, then her eyes went to the floor. Her smile faded.

"I don't know how to feel," she whispered. She paused then. Levi waited, without a clue as to where this was going.

"I've never been truly scared to go on a mission, and I've never been hopeful either," she continued, eyes still to the floor. "But now with Eren on our side, there finally is hope." Her face lightened. Levi's expression never changed.

"But I'm scared, too," she said. She looked up at the captain, fear returning to her eyes. "I don't know why but I'm so scared, Levi." His face softened, almost revealing his concern. "I just don't know…" her voice died out and she put her head in her hands. Levi was at a loss for words. He stared at her eyes wide, mouth slightly open, brows raised in concern. He knew exactly what she was feeling, but to express it into reassuring words and placing them with soothing gestures was out of bounds. A minute passed by. He mentally scolded himself before clearing his throat to speak.

"I understand, Petra," he started. She looked back up at him. "It's the odd feelings of an emergence of something good and hopeful only to have to worry about it being taken away. It's true; Eren is our only hope for survival. And if this plan doesn't work out, what do we have left?" Levi sighed.

"But there's no reason to be scared of what may come if that should happen. You are surrounded by people who would give up their lives for you, as you would for them. Correct?" Petra nodded. "If all else fails you still have the people around you. That should give enough hope for anyone's survival." Petra sighed quietly, eyes falling back to the floor. A subtle smile graced her lips. Levi's face had remained cold, yet encouraging. He watched her, still from the desk, waiting for her reaction. A few moments passed in silence. Suddenly, Petra stood up and walked over to Levi. She was only a few inches from his face.

"Thank you," she said, and kissed him on the mouth. It was a quick kiss, but long enough to leave a lasting taste. Levi's eyes had shot open the widest they'd ever been and his face went crimson. Before he'd had time to gauge what had happened, she was nearly at the door. Everything seemed to move in slow motion.

Levi had done something right. Levi had temporarily come out of his emotional constipation was able to comfort one of his subordinates whom he truly cared about. This same subordinate had put her lips against his. And he was about to let her leave.

Without another though he reached out and grabbed her wrist. Her body stiffened. She stayed facing the door, head down. Levi looked at the back of her head with pleading eyes.

"Don't," he said. Petra swallowed hard. She turned to look at him and found a strange sight. The man she stared at was definitely Levi, but his expression was completely out of character. His eyes pleaded with her, mouth parted slightly, and brows drawn together with unease.

"Stay," he said. It was not an order, and yet she would obey. She turned around fully, smiling slightly. Levi let go of her wrist and went to turn off the lantern. He went over to his bed and lay down on his back. Petra walked over and lay down next to him. She put her head on his shoulder and her left arm across his chest. Awkwardly, he placed his left arm on her shoulder and wrapped his right arm around her waist.

She could sense his discomfort, but chose to revel in the moment. To him, this was more terrifying than any Titan. It was unfamiliar and uncomfortable, but he, too, chose to bask in it.

Together they would lie until morning, until the day of fate. Either they'd be celebrating hope, or facing fear.

**Thanks for reading. Let me know what you think if you feel so compelled.**


End file.
